The more I think about negotiation, the more I see that it’s something we do every day—often without even noticing. Every choice we make, every commitment we take on, and every action we follow through with is a form of negotiation. These decisions shape our future, whether we realize it or not.
In today’s fast-paced business world, it’s easy to prioritize short-term wins. But should immediate gratification drive our decision-making? I believe the answer is a clear “No.” Strong leadership requires looking beyond the present, assessing long-term impacts, and making informed choices—even in uncertainty.
"If everything is a priority, then nothing is a priority!"
- Jeffrey A. Rogers, CPMBC
Being a good leader isn’t just about making decisions. It’s about building strong systems and creating teams that can carry out those systems successfully. Along the way, we pick up important lessons that help us become better negotiators. Have you noticed them? Let me dive into my thoughts more clearly.
The Keys of a Successful Negotiation
Understanding your priorities is paramount to good Negotiation. There are many strategies one can choose from, different styles of Negotiation, and preferred tactics to implement. Use what works for you and leverage your strengths while negotiating. Build up your weaknesses because if your opponent does their job, they will exploit them. I prefer a more Collaborative Negotiation Style for significant negotiations to limit weaknesses and amplify strengths. Get all the brains into the effort.
1. Positive Mindset 🌱
Key Idea: Enter conversations with an open and positive outcome mindset, even when challenging.
Why It Matters: When your mindset is open and growth-oriented, positive outcomes are more likely to prevail.
Example: During a salary negotiation, instead of assuming your employer will reject your request, approach the conversation with confidence and an openness to finding a mutually beneficial solution. This mindset increases the likelihood of a productive discussion and a favorable outcome.
2. Active Listening 👂
Key Idea: Listen with your eyes, ears, and gut.
Why It Matters: Body language and tone will inform you more than words alone. This is critical information you don’t want to miss.
Example: In a business deal, if a potential partner hesitates when discussing pricing, pay attention to their tone and body language. This might indicate flexibility, giving you an opportunity to explore alternative pricing structures that work for both parties.
3. Preparation 📚
Key Idea: Get fully informed about your goals, desired outcomes, and those of your opponent.
Why It Matters: Active preparation will help you anticipate challenges and better inform decisions during the negotiation.
Example: Before negotiating a contract with a supplier, research market prices, competitor rates, and the supplier’s business needs. This preparation allows you to anticipate their objections and make compelling arguments for better terms.
4. Emotional Regulation 😌
Key Idea: Stay composed and calm while negotiating.
Why It Matters: Self-awareness and self-control allow you to make rational decisions, fostering successful outcomes where all parties leave satisfied.
Example: When a client unexpectedly rejects your proposal, instead of reacting defensively, take a deep breath and calmly ask clarifying questions. This helps maintain professionalism and keeps the negotiation on track.
5. Trustful Behavior 🤝
Key Idea: Integrity and trustful behavior build strong foundations in negotiations.
Why It Matters: Trust ensures better collaboration. Align your words, tone, and body language to reinforce credibility.
Example: If you promise a vendor extended business in exchange for a discount, follow through on your commitment. Keeping your word builds credibility and strengthens long-term business relationships.
6. Communication Clarity 💬
Key Idea: Communicate clearly, concisely, and respectfully.
Why It Matters: Clear communication prevents misunderstandings and ensures that everyone is aligned on expectations.
Example: When finalizing a partnership agreement, clearly outline deliverables, timelines, and expectations to prevent misunderstandings. This ensures all parties are aligned and reduces the risk of conflict.
7. Win-Win-Win 🎉
Key Idea: Strive for mutually beneficial outcomes.
Why It Matters: Successful negotiations are not about winning at the expense of others but ensuring that all parties achieve something important.
Example: Instead of demanding a lower price from a supplier, negotiate a bulk order discount that benefits both sides—lower costs for you and increased volume for them. This fosters a positive, long-term relationship.
8. Use of Leverage ⚖️
Key Idea: Recognize and use leverage as a positive tool.
Why It Matters: Effective use of leverage can lead to creative solutions without alienating the opposing party.
Example: If a competitor offers you a better deal on software, use that information strategically to negotiate improved pricing or additional features from your current provider without being confrontational.
9. Adaptability 🔄
Key Idea: Be flexible and willing to pivot when needed.
Why It Matters: Adaptability allows you to find alternative solutions and maintain progress during difficult negotiations.
Example: During a merger negotiation, if the initial terms don’t align, be open to restructuring the deal—perhaps adjusting payment terms or responsibilities—to ensure both companies benefit.
10. Patience 🕒
Key Idea: Take time to explore all options before concluding.
Why It Matters: Rushing can result in missed opportunities. Patience allows you to make well-informed decisions and maximize outcomes.
Example: When negotiating a real estate deal, resist the urge to accept the first offer. Take the time to explore counteroffers and additional incentives, leading to a better long-term investment.
Human Qualities Make Negotiating Especially Difficult
To be a good negotiator, one must balance the above concepts and always be reading the room, ready to adapt. Enter situational awareness. Everything looks great on paper until you add people to the equation; ask any football coach!
When people get added to any equation, unexpected variables flood the equation. Your ability to read the room, adapt to unique situations, interpret unexpected variables, and keep an eye on your original outcome is a true talent. Many cannot keep this aligned and moving forward, especially with more significant stakes.
If you haven’t yet mastered this skill, it’s essential to have the right team, executing the right strategies at the right time to achieve the best results. Negotiation can—and should—be systemized. This involves contingency planning, anticipating alternative outcomes, assessing potential impacts with reasonable certainty, forecasting results, and considering unintended consequences. Together, these elements strengthen situational awareness and improve decision-making.
Again, this emphasizes the need for collaborative negotiation.
I hope something here has caught your attention and you can use these principles as a framework to guide your negotiation strategies for positive and effective results. If I could suggest just one thing to take away, it would be to enter negotiations with maximum preparation. When you think you are well prepared, prepare more. You will be glad you did!
